I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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