bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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