Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
