it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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