She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Randomize
