Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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