so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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