Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize