he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
i would one night stand the shit outta him
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Dick very happy bro
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
