Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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