yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
