right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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