So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
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