He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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