So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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