she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize