I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
