Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Farmville is her only friend.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
