mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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