...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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