yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
