Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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