As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
