so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
