Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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