Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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