david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
