I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
