You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
