she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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