Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
