I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
