Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
