I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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