I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
