Michael Bay diarrhea
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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