ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
