I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I want her autograph on my taint
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
