You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
