Swine flu. Run for my life!
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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