I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
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