Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
OPIZZABONMYDICK
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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