Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
