I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I'm at about main and main street
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Pooping to opera.
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