My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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