But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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