The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
