nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Randomize
