I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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