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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Operation Purity has been aborted
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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